1,095 Days

I always talk about how crazy it is that one decision, even just one moment, can alter the course of your life. It’s a source of my anxiety honestly. How can we ever make decisions when we are completely aware that it could change everything? Obviously some decisions don’t seem like they matter that much, like where to eat, but think about the people that end up meeting their spouse at a coffee shop or meeting your next boss at a restaurant. There are stories about connections like that every where you look, and yet indecisiveness seems silly and inefficient.

A 6 hour phone call completely altered the course of my life, so I’m a firm believer that my decisions matter. I was vehemently against moving to Arkansas (what the hell is in Arkansas?). I packed all of my things into boxes and shipped them off regardless. I boarded a plane to Memphis to meet my nana and great aunt on the other end. We took a detour to Florida before heading back to Arkansas and then real life set back in. I needed a job and to get my life on track.

In walks J. We met online (if you’re still judgmental about that, it’s time to wake up to 2018), and I was hesitant to say the least. I refused to give him my phone number for 2-3 days, but it was worth the wait because it led to that 6 hour phone call I was talking about. I can’t even remember what we talked about honestly, but it was non-stop. I remember jumping up and down (I was 18, obviously) after we got off the phone, and I was so excited for our date the next day. We went on our date, which was simple and very fitting of who we would become as a couple.

Fast forward to now, and we’ve been married for 3 years today. That’s 1,095 days since we said our vows on that mountain, and I haven’t regretted a single moment of it. The past three years have been about growth for us. We’ve been growing into adults, into marriage, into jobs, and ultimately, into future parenthood. We’ve been learning and preparing for our future. There’s no one else that I would rather make goals with and keep checking them off one by one (because we know how much I love my lists and check marks).

To my husband, thank you for being the most supportive and kind hearted man I know. I know that I could technically survive without you, but I never want to have to. You bring so much fullness to my heart, and you push me to be better every day. I’ve always said that I don’t see the point in a relationship if both people don’t make the other better, and I can say without a shadow of a doubt, you make me better. You opened up an entire future that I didn’t even know I wanted and showed me love that I wasn’t sure existed. Furthermore, and maybe most importantly, you’ve helped me discover the woman that I want to be for myself, for you, for our future children, and for the world. Thank you for letting me create a permanent home inside of your heart. Thank you for being the man that I’m proud to stand beside. I appreciate you and I love you with all of my heart.

Happy anniversary.